Title: Beside the Evening Sun
Author: James Walkswithwind
Series: Scene shots
Archive: list archives only
Disclaimer: not mine, no profit made
Summary: single scenes of the lives of Wesley and Gunn
Beside the Evening Sun
He really, really hated it. He tried not to notice, tried to pretend
he didn't care. Tried to smile and wave a casual hand and say
'whatever, have fun' without screaming.
Angel figured it was part of his redemption. A detail of his epiphany
he hadn't realised was there, a consequence no one had warned him
about, the way no one had ever warned him about anything once the
Admittedly, no one had warned him about anything since he'd been 13
and his father had given up trying to tell him what would happen if he
didn't straighten up.
But he did watch them, and he did notice, and he did care. No one
could help but see the way Wesley smiled when Gunn walked into the
room, or said Wes' name, or brushed close by enough to touch. No one
could miss how Gunn's attention tracked onto Wesley no matter what
else was happening, especially in a fight, or a bar, or the otherwise
empty lobby of the Hyperion.
Angel couldn't decide what made it worse. Was it that, once upon a
time, he had had the chance to make Wesley look at him that way? Turn
the worshipful gratitude into something more real, something more
enduring and equal? He'd not done, out of his own fears and lack of
interest. Still in pain of losing Buffy, and Doyle, he hadn't wanted
to admit he needed friends, much less warmth.
Or was it just that right now, he didn't love. Wasn't loved, and had
been it and seen it and had it, and now he didn't, and seeing it in
someone else just made him feel lonely?
He was watching them now, walking out the door, laughing quietly at
something. They'd be gone all night, back tomorrow with smiles and
laughter and words said that only they understood. He turned to go
upstairs, and found Cordelia standing behind him.
Holding out a carton of ice cream.
"Hook up the VCR. I've rented movies."